Vincent has all the dreams everyone fail to achieve. He lives his life to the fullest.
He lives each day like the most fulfilled man in the world.
Vincent's the CEO of his family's company, the husband to a very loving wife, and the father to hyperactive, jolly twins.
He lives the life of security, stability and sustainability.
Why is it every time he looks behind, something like regret pokes at the back of his mind?
Why is it every time his wife kisses him, he wishes for someone else to be there?
Why would he think of a person whose heart he broke?
Why does he linger every time his mind strays backwards?
Why would he have regrets over a man and an event that happened 10 years ago?
Why now, as an accomplished 30 year old, would he think of a sad smile and lilting eyes?
He tried to find answers. He tried to confront the truth.
But, he's still in denial.
Vincent's still so afraid.
This is a severely cruel joke for all the times he played with Harvey's feelings and pretended to be indifferent.
Being young and stupid is not an excuse. He knew that at that age of 17, he was better.
But did his actions proved so?
He remembers so painstakingly vivid, becoming the 18 year old he once was, back again in the dimly-lit ballroom of his High School Prom Night.
He's no longer in a meeting droning on an explanation his secretary was trying to tell him.
He's no longer crushed in white walls and muted stares.
He's no longer flitting towards the man at the far end of the table, noticing the way he hunches into himself.
Inappropriate posture, he thought.
He's back into staring across the ballroom, gaze meeting halfway with brilliant eyes and warm smiles.
He's drawn towards this boy kindly talking to his friends.
Vincent knew his teenage-self.
Vincent remembers taking chances.
He walked up to the boy, someone probably of his age, somewhat startled but in the form of "pleasantly surprised".
"Hey," the boy began.
"Hey," Vincent shrugs back.
He gulps down the juice from the glass he was holding.
How to Friends?
Vincent remembers the awkward cough of the said boy.
"I saw you staring across the room," the boy surmises. Vincent laughs this off, commenting about his great observation.
"You're too obvious, even my friends were creeped out." Vincent laughs again at what the boy said.
"Anyway," Vincent forces out between dying chuckles. "What's your name?"
The boy held out his hand.
"Harvey," he smiles, Vincent grasping Harvey's hand and shook it.
"Good to be acquianted," Harvey continues.
"Good to be acquianted," Vincent agrees. He wasn't sure what that meant.
It felt along the lines of friendship though, so he went along with it.
Vincent remembers that moment so clearly.
He remembers the way Harvey would snicker at his own joke, or the way his eyes light up when some good music starts to play.
He remembers all of the little details: tousled brown hair, lanky, tall build, clear blue eyes and wide smile.
Harvey was sunshine back then.
Now, looking at the same man hunched on his seat, Vincent could only wonder where did Harvey go.
Is this really Harvey?
Did Vincent bring this out of him?
Vincent understands the awkwardness of their situation. Harvey and Vincent's family have strong business ties, and that meant either way, they'll have to work for each other.
It was only unlucky Harvey and Vincent worked together.
"The meeting is adjourned," Vincent finally announces, hands stretching above him.
Once again, he found himself flitting towards the crouched creature- now standing to his full height.
He still has the same aura of friendliness penetrating even across the room.
He still snickers at his own lame jokes.
He still attracts people, like as if he were a magnetic force, people drawn towards him naturally.
Nothing changed, except for one detail.
When Harvey used to smile like sunshine, his smile nowadays looked tired.
Harvey looks exhausted.
He looks like he's ready to leave and be excused.
He looks like he wants to run away from a constant reminder of heartbreak.
He looks like he wants to run away from Vincent.
It wasn't the fact that Harvey barely spoke to Vincent that hurts.
Vincent wasn't upset of Harvey's lack of contact with him after they fell out.
Vincent didn't blame Harvey for anything at all.
What hurts the most is the change of Harvey's smile.
What hurts the most is that Vincent knew he did this to Harvey.
And he could never forgive himself.
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