Last night, you saw a weird commercial. It showcased several characters from pop culture, like celebrities, fictional characters, and the like. You thought it was nothing more than a dream, but within a few days, you saw people walking hand in hand with famous icons, from characters you knew from your youth, to today’s pop stars.
Weeks later, a familiar ad shows up while browsing the web. Specifically, it was one of those pesky five second ads that you can’t skip past before YouTube videos. Though you didn’t pay much attention to it, the upbeat background music seemed to get some cogs turning in your subconscious. You looked at the ad right before it closed, and managed to grab a snippet of information.
Discover X-Loid today!
You opened a new tab to search the term, and multiple sites came up.
X-Loid – Where dreams and reality merge!
What you need to know about the new X-Loid trend
Are X-Loids going too far?
Florida woman marries X-Loid, family calls him “ideal son-in-law.” Her ex says otherwise…
Oh, wait. That last one is just clickbait. You decide your best bet is the official website. On it, you found a brief explanation to this curious anomaly. These were some strain of AI who you could order and befriend, like a mail-order bride or something. As you sifted through all the lines they carried, you couldn’t help but to be drawn to the final tab. It read, “Stuck? Take this quiz to find your match!” You clicked through the quiz mindlessly, like you would any other personality quiz.
“…Congratulations! Your order has been processed!”
Six or so weeks had passed without notable incident. There had been several small transactions for your purchase, though none cost more than fifteen dollars, through some stroke of luck. Meanwhile, you read up on X-Loids. You were beginning to wonder if you had fallen victim to a scam, but lo and behold that one day, you saw an unfamiliar truck parked across the street. You watched from your couch, until a man started to carry a large crate towards your house! You opened the door with haste to meet the delivery man. From behind the crate, he asked your name.
After answering, the delivery man didn’t hesitate in wheeling the package to the middle of your living room and laying it down. After you signed, he pried the crate open for you, and bid you good day. All there was to do now was seeing who your match was. Your hand shook with anticipation as you grabbed for the top of the box, and softly pried it open...
...Oh, a manual. You supposed it may benefit you in the long run to read this before you even dare to look upon the face of your new roommate. Otherwise, you might not ever read it.
General Guide and Manual
TABLE OF CONTENTS
Congratulations on your purchase of X-Loid™, where dreams and reality merge! You can now live happily with pop icons, celebrities, and even fictional characters! This guide will ensure both you and your X-Loid™’s wellbeing and overall satisfaction. For more details, look in your X-Loid™’s box for their specialized manual.
When your X-Loid™ first arrives, they will be in sleep mode. Each model has a few different methods to waking up, but it’s generally related to introducing them to a familiar environment: playing a musician their own song, the smell of a favorite food or beverage, or the feeling of a treasured item, which was included in your package.
There are two different modes that most X-Loids™ can be set to: Kid Mode and Adult Mode.* Kid Mode will generally provide a cleaner and more wholesome experience, and will prevent any sort of romantic attraction to anyone. Adult Mode will provide a more accurate characterization, and romantic attraction may develop.** The modes can be switched at any time, but it’s recommended that you choose before waking your X-Loid™.Otherwise, you will have to reboot your model, and risk wiping its memory.
*Some modes not available for all models due to nature of character.
**Not guaranteed. We neither condone nor condemn engaging in courtship with your X-Loid™.
X-Loids™ charge in many of the ways we do to create a more life-like experience. They do eat and sleep like us, but there are some differences. Be aware of allergies and dislikes. X-Loids™ must sleep in total darkness to recharge. It’s recommended to turn off any sort of screen that isn’t a necessity. X-Loids™ take 6-10 hours of rest to regenerate fully, depending on the model. Feeding will help maintain a steady and reliable waking and sleeping time, allowing your X-Loid™ to behave more human. In the event of unconsciousness, you will want to feel the left side of the chest. If there is a soft tick, move your X-Loid™ to a dark, quiet place. If not, see page 7.
My X-Loid™ won’t wake up?
Reread model-specific manual, and try all available options. If there is still no response, contact us.
My X-Loid™ doesn’t like me?
Not all people will like you, and the same goes for X-Loids™. A partial refund may be offered, but first try to get along with them. A little love goes a long way!
My X-Loid™ doesn’t have a Kid Mode?
Not all come with kid mode, due to the contradiction with their nature.
My X-Loid™ stays tired?
It could be due to diet, the nature of the model, or a bad battery. If you suspect it to be the battery, see page 7.
See our website for a full list of products, factories, and servicing centers near you.
With general manual read, you were feeling a little more confident. Yeah! You could handle something like this, easy. You tugged the second piece of cardboard towards you, revealing...